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Okay, so I realize the purple and orange font from my past entries doesn't go so well with the new layout, but I figure if I journal as much as I am supposed to then those colors will be at the bottom and it won't matter! :)

So let's see. It's been a while since I last posted an entry. I'll try to remember what's been happening since then!

Before I start rambling, I wanted to let you all know about the agency that my friend, Stephannie, and I run.  It's called Great Expectations Surrogacy (GES) and the website is www.greatexpectationssurrogacy.com if you're interested in being a surrogate or if you are wanting a surrogate, then that is the place to go! We haven't been up long but we already have some surrogates signed up which is great! It's truly a blessing to be able to help others have a family when otherwise they wouldn't have been able to. I love the surrogacy world.

Gracelynn came home again on Friday. I went to the casino Friday night for just a few hours. I was all dolled up, looking mighty cute if I might say so myself. I had more than a handful of guys hit on me. :) It made me feel semi-human again instead of just MOM. Ya know the feeling, I know ya do. Especially if I've kept your interest this far lol you've gotta be a mom! So I brought $20 with me (Big Spender, I know!) and I lost it to the slots (of course lol). Well I sat down next to an older guy (40s maybe 50s) and just watched him, kinda hangin out drinking my (non-alcoholic) strawberry daiquiri (shh my friends don't know it was non-alcoholic lol). We made small talk and he asked why I wasn't playing so I told him I blew all my money. He handed me a $10 bill and told me to play for a little bit. I did, and I won $40! I had moved to a different machine so I went to look for him to give him the $40 (I figure it was his, not mine!), he was gone. So I went home with $40! :) It was really a pretty fun night.

Yesterday, I took the kids to the zoo. Allow me to elaborate.. when I say kids, I mean my three kids (Jenelle, 6, Gracelynn, 2.5, Sapphire, 14 months), plus the two kids I was babysitting (Nick, 5, Drake, 11). PLUS my friend Misty and her kids (6, 14 months). PLUS my friend Mary and her two kids (Bob, 4, Annabell, 4 months). So if you kept up, you'd know we had NINE CHILDREN AT THE ZOO ON A SATURDAY lol. We did pretty well. We actually only got to be at the zoo for maybe an hour because it closed at 5 and we didn't get there til after 3:30. It wasn't bad, though. It was nice to see Misty - I hadn't seen her since I lived out at Our Lady's Inn (she lived there too for a while).

Today, Mary's son woke Gracelynn up at 4AM. Yes, four o'clock in the morning on a freakin' Sunday. He came downstairs with his mom to fix the baby a bottle and was talking, and talking.. oh, and talking... yeah. So it woke Gracelynn up. She refused to go back to sleep. Then Sapphire woke up at like 5:30.. So yeah it was crazy. We went to the flea market at about 8AM and walked around til 10. We were going to go to church, but I was just wore out. Plus, I needed to clean the house. So I cleaned the living room (it got trashed again with 5 kids here lol), and then I cleaned my bedroom. I am ALMOST completely done with both rooms. The kitchen will take maybe 15 minutes to finish completely. The basement isn't so bad, just LOTS AND LOTS of clothes - they are almost all clean so I guess it's not bad. Then there is Jenelle's room which will only take a few minutes. And Sapphire's which will take a while. Both bathrooms are clean, because they're always clean... I'm a freak about keeping the bathroom clean. No clue why.. lol the rest of the house is always trashed. Oh well. :)

Well, I need to check my mail and get to bed. This daylight savings time crap messed the kids up, majorly. Sapphire took two naps today and they totaled about 4 hours. She fell asleep for the night at about 7PM. Jenelle fell asleep at about 2PM and is still sleeping (It's 8PM). She would NOT wake up for dinner, no matter how hard I tried to get her up. So I left her dinner out for her and I figure if she wakes up she can put a movie in or something if she isn't tired. I know how it is to get too much sleep and be wide awake. I mean, I USED to know what that was like!! :)

Wow

Wow. Usually when I log on, it says something like "3 hours since your last entry" and I argue back and forth with myself until I finally decide that I shouldn't write again so soon. This time it says "3 days since your last entry". I'm like, what?! Three DAYS? Where have they gone?? Wow! That's about all I can say about that one. :)

So, today is Sunday...right? Right. Thursday night, I met up with a friend of mine (Renee - we met on Cafe Mom!), and we took the kids to a trick or treat thing at the local high school. We had a blast, but it wore me out because I forgot the stroller! Then, Friday I worked allllll day. At about 4PM, I picked Gracelynn up from her Grammie's house. I brought all three kids to the babysitter, and I WENT TO A CASTING CROWNS CONCERT!! :) It was actually Jenelle's birthday present, but at the last minute she changed her mind and said she didn't want to go. So, I invited my friend's son, Jeremiah (one of the kids I babysat all last week). He came with me and we had SO MUCH FUN! Casting Crowns is like my favorite group, ever. So it was just a blessing to be able to go. Didn't get to bed until about midnight, and then woke up at 6 on Saturday morning. I cleaned my room a little bit (I am too embarrassed to post before and after pictures, but they're amazing lol), and then I went to do a mystery shop. It was a little weird ordering alcohol at 11 in the morning, but that was part of the shop, so I did it. :)

After that, I went to pick up my kids and I also took Melinda's two kids (she's the one who watched my girls while I went to the concert). Her kids are both boys, ages 5 and 11. Then of course I had my girls, ages 6, 2, and 1. We were listening to Joy FM (www.joyfmonline.org), and they advertised for some sort of festival-carnival thing going on in St. Peters, which is only like 20 minutes from us. So I packed up ALL FIVE KIDS (lol crazy, I know), and we went to the carnival. IT WAS AWESOME! :) There was a clown on roller blades who made us all balloon animals (yes, even me. Hush.) We had snow cones, hot dogs, popcorn, lemonade, and cookies. And the best part? IT WAS ALL FREE!! :) We got to play games, get in the fire truck (those firefighters were HOT lol), and lots of other stuff. We went home at about 3 and took a nap until 5:30 when it was time to go to our church for the "Treats from the Trunk". Now THAT was awesome!! :)

I was a witch (a pretty witch, I might add). Sapphire dressed up as a pumpkin (okay, I forced the child. So what!). Jenelle was a pirate. Gracelynn wanted to be a princess, then changed her mind and wanted to be a firefighter. So she was a firefighting princess. BUT then on the way there she wanted to be a cat, so she was a ... uh.. firefighting princess cat. lmao And when people asked what she was, she told them "fire ditin pwincess cat" and they just nodded and smiled lol! We got to eat hot dogs, chili, cupcakes and cookies. And also got hot cocoa! Yum! It was all free, too. It was a huge blessing for all of us. Melinda's kids don't go to church, so I bring them with us whenever they are here. They were actually excited to go to church this morning, so that made me really happy. I think they had a lot of fun. :)

So, that brings us to today.. it's Sunday. I think I said that already. :) I planned on writing the rest of my little "life story", but I'll save that for another day I suppose. There's not much left of it, really. Just this past year. Nothing too interesting, I promise.

I totally have the travel-itch. Ever had it? Where you finally get the chance to see the ocean, and you're dying to go back!! So much so that you want to MOVE THERE?! Okay, so maybe it's just me. But I want to MOVE so badly. I keep praying about it, but my prayers are always distracted by views of the ocean. I guess if God is saying "NO" I won't hear it. So I am going to keep praying, and keep listening. I know I'm supposed to be used in a BIG way... I am going to be used to do great things, through God, so I just need to be patient. PATIENCE.. hah. I'm bad about that. But I'm still learning, growing, and persevering (Wow thank God for spell check .. woops! lol)! :)

Have a great week, everyone! I work tomorrow.. it's our Halloween party. I am gonna be a CLOWN hehe. The kids will love it!

Here we go again

Well, I'm not in a chit-chat type of mood today... so instead of posting random stuff that is happening in my life, I will continue with my "life story".. or more like a saga or soap opera! :)

I think I left off when I was talking about giving the baby up for adoption. I found out in July 2006 that the "boy" I was having was actually a girl. I started feeling seriously guilty about giving her up for adoption. Why it was different is beyond me, but it was. I've had a LOT of people give me crap over that over the past year when I've told my story, but that's just the honest truth. I'm not one to sugarcoat things, and I won't say I changed my mind because I had some "Hallelujah!" moment, because I didn't. I changed my mind because I now saw the baby as a little sister for my girls. What kind of mother would I be to my other two girls if I gave their little sister up? That's what I kept thinking. Over the next week, I started trying to figure out how to survive on my own with three little ones. When it was seeming next to impossible, I stumbled upon some help sites online. I was actually looking for help with my electric bill, because my electric was going to get shut off. I was just really stressed out, and had been having problems with the adoptive family, so it was just all too much. 

That's when I found Our Lady's Inn. Their link was on the same page as the Salvation Army's. I was kind of scared of the name "Our Lady's Inn" - it sounded like an old convent. But I figured it was better than giving my baby up for adoption, so I called them. I didn't get ahold of anyone right away, but Mrs. Betsy called me back the next day. I had called the St. Louis location, but they had just opened a location in Defiance a few months before (thank GOD!.. the St. Louis one was G-H-E-T-T-O). So anyway, I talked to her about my situation and she said I could move in the next week. I was so happy, that I spent half the day crying. I told the adoptive parents about it, and they freaked out (of course) and told me to get out - NOW. So, I cried some more. I called Mrs. Betsy back and she said that I could come up tomorrow. I called her on July 4th - I moved into Our Lady's Inn on July 5th. 

When I first got there, I was really impressed with how nice the place was. It used to be a nursing home, and was only built a few years prior. Every family had their own room. I got put in room 6. It was small, but doable. They put Gracelynn in a crib, because the rule at the house was that until they are 2 years old they HAVE to sleep in a crib. Well, Gracelynn had been sleeping in a toddler bed for a while at that point. She was only 18 months old but she slept with her sissy, and was used to that. She screamed the whole first night. Finally, they decided to letme use a toddler bed for her. From then on, things were fine (at least in regards to that aspect).

My "Family Specialist" was Ms. Carla. I know that God had His hand in the timing, and me getting her as a specialist. She was just what I needed. I told her the true story about everything, and she prayed and cried with me. I haven't ever told anyone the things I've told her. I don't know why I decided to be truthful with her, but I did. In some ways, I'm glad I did. But in other ways, I wish I hadn't - I feel very vulnerable when I am around her. I have only seen her a few times since I left Our Lady's Inn, but it still just stings me when I see her.

Anyway, Sapphire was born on August 30th, 2006. I had the most WONDERFUL doula in the whole entire world - her name is Traci. I hope I spelled that right lol. I was really hoping to not have to be induced, but the doctor was set on it so I just gave in. I was sick of being pregnant, ya know? And it was more convenient to actually know when I was going to be in labor, so I could have child care for the kids. Sapphire weighed 6lbs 10oz. She was my tiniest baby yet. My best friend (at the time), Cindy, was with me the whole way. She was there at 5AM when I got induced.. she was there at 5:25PM when Sapphire was born. She cut her cord, actually. Cindy lived at OLI with me, and had issues of her own.. but she was definitely my best friend for that time. We had a falling out not too long after we moved out of OLI and I haven't talked to her since. Sometimes I wonder about the friends that I made at OLI. I wonder how they are doing, where they are, just stuff like that. I actually keep in touch with two of the other ladies from OLI, and I saw Mrs. Betsy at my monthly PWG (Professional Women's Group) meeting for the first time last month. I hadn't seen her in a year. It was so nice! :)

The girls and I stayed at Our Lady's Inn for 4 months. I got approved for NECAC, which is an income based grant program for rent. We moved to Wentzville, to our new three bedroom townhouse, on November 4th, 2006. Sapphire was a few months old. When we moved out of OLI, things came together in ways that were only possible through GOD. I know some things you can be like "Oh.. yeah that was God." but no.. this was like "WOW!! That HAD to be God!". I didn't have a dime to my name, and my whole townhouse got furnished. Different church groups and even individuals all helped me move in. I didn't have to move hardly anything - they did ALL of the work. And you know, the housewarming gifts that I got.. they were so helpful. People got me dish soap, laundry soap, diapers, etc. I didn't have to buy diapers for probably 4 months. I STILL haven't had to buy any laundry soap or toilet paper, and it's been almost a year! I haven't even had to buy shampoo. It's just amazing what they did for us. I feel like I could never thank them enough. And I think they are part of the reason I am always helping other people. I know what it feels like to be down on my luck.. and I know how good it feels to get help once in a while.

That's why I created the group "You Can Do It! (We Can Help!)" at Cafe Mom. I know there are moms going through struggles right now that nobody knows about. I know they are stuck in "mom" mode, just like I am. I also know that through helping others, we help ourselves. So the group is all about empowering ourselves while helping others. It's just going to be an amazing group - I can feel it! :) (www.cafemom.com/group/wecandoit is the link if you're interested in joining.)

POSITIVE Group at CAFE MOM

I just created a group that I think you might enjoy. www.cafemom.com/group/wecandoit - check it out.

Hugs

Sadie

LOL

This morning, I was in a huge hurry and on my way to work. I was preoccupied with what my day held and I rear-ended a car at a stop light because I was not really paying attention.

I had hot chocolate in my lap and I was running late. "Great, just great," I muttered.

The driver opened his door........leaned out of his car and stared at me.

He was a dwarf.

He got out, studied the damage on his bumper, and walked towards me as I rolled down my window.

He said, "I'm not happy"...

To which I replied, "Well ..... which one are you then?"

Felt like I should post this..

 I was reading in the Bible earlier and what I'm getting ready to type helped me a lot. It's the Bible, but has notes and commentary from Joyce Meyer. She's not my favorite, but she preaches the truth! An old friend gave me this Bible and said she didn't like "how Joyce talks through the whole thing". Well, it's still the Bible. It's just got her added notes on the side or whatever. I think the reason my friend didn't like it is because Joyce Meyer stepped on her toes by writing these things! They are the TRUTH and they will make you THINK. Some people don't like that. So, without further ado (is that how you spell that? lol), I will retype what I found on page 1107 in my Bible.

In Isaiah 43:2, God tells us that He will be with us as we go through the water and through the fire. This means that we will have to face some tests and trials in our lives; they cannot be avoided. There will be some difficult things that we have to go through.

I do not know what specific form your challenges may take, but I know that they are intended to strengthen you, to develop your character, to cause you to persevere, to sanctify you, to purify you, to teach you the unique lessons of suffering, to teach you the benefits and disciplines of sacrifice, and to make you a better person. You
may cringe as you think about these things, but if you really want to fulfill your potential, you simply must be prepared to go through them.

 I have been through many tests and trials. I have faced loneliness, obstacles, and persecution. There have been times when I wanted to give up, and in the midst of those times, God often put someone in my life I did not particularly like or want to deal with. I know now that He placed those people near me because I needed them. He used them to be the sandpaper that was needed to smooth my rough edges.

Has God put someone or something in your life as sandpaper? That situation may feel like a flood or a fire to you, but it is serving a great purpose, and God is going to take you through the difficulty to the other side. He is going to use it to strengthen you, change you, and advance His purpose for you life.

God must take us through hard things because He must change us in order to use us. We must become like Jesus in our character; we must follow His example and walk in His Ways. Gifts are given to us by God, but good fruit and godly character must be developed.

I struggled with the process of change for a long time, but I finally realized that I was not going to succeed in getting God to do things my way. He did not want to hear an argument from me; He wanted to hear, "Yes, Lord. Your will be done."

We will always face obstacles and difficulties - "floods and fires" - as God continues to strengthen us and prepare us to be used in His service in greater and greater ways. We would be wise to settle down and deal with the challenges He puts before us. Whatever they are, if we will receive them as His training for us and submit to His will, we will not get stuck, but go through to victory.


I'm sorry if there are any typos, as I was looking at the Book while typing. I just felt like I needed to put that out there. For someone, somewhere. I might not ever know who it was for or who it helped, but I know I didn't get it put in my heart for nothin'! :) 

That's about it for right now. I might say more later but I need to get a nap.. I am still recovering from watching the kids all week. Their parents got home last night. :)

 

Ain't it funny?

Are people just not able to comment on my page here? lol Seriously. I'm curious. Show me that you people can comment! :) I have had over 20 messages on Cafe Mom from other mommas telling me they are reading my blog. I just feel as if I am talking to myself when I am typing here, though. Makes me feel a little crazy.

Actually, after reading this blog of mine, you might think I am crazy.. as if you didn't think that already. Well, I called my mom this week and I told her that if she didn't move up by us, we were moving from here (Missouri) to California or Florida or something. Mom has been promising me for about 2 years now that she would move up here, and she hasn't. What's the point of having family in the same state if they are 2 hours away and you only see them like once a month? No point to that at all, in my opinion. So I wasn't trying to be mean, but mom is the type that works  better under pressure - she needs an ultimatum to make decisions. That was the ultimatum.

So she called me the next day and told me that if I wanted to move far away, she would move with me. I sat down and madea list of the 50 states. I quickly narrowed our choices down to about 5 or 6. Then I changed it, and narrowed it down again lol. 

The final choices are:

Florida (by the beach, still looking into inexpensive cities)
California (sadly, this isn't a realistic choice but I would LOVE to live in Cali)
Carolina (either one, near the beach)
Oregon

I think Oregon is pretty much out, because of the rain. I love rain, but mom doesn't. So we have FL, CA and SC or NC. I looked at the NC Chamber of Commerce page today and was pretty impressed, but when I spoke with moms that lived there - they were not. I want to live somewhere that has public transportation like buses, trolleys, etc. So if I want to sell my car before I move, I'll be fine until I can afford another one when I'm there. Ya know?

Then of course we have to take out California because it's so darned expensive. And because of the stupid wildfires. I wish Cali could take some of Oregon's rain. Then we'd all be happy lol. So no Oregon, no Cali. We have either Florida or one of the Carolinas. I'm really not keen on winter, so I'm looking into the weather in NC and SC, because if it's snowy or icy - EVER - then they are out of the question.

Mom says maybe we should move to Florida and see if we like it. If we don't, we can always move. I lead a pretty simple lifestyle, and mom does too. We will only be taking a few boxes each. I figure, enough to fill up a small U-Haul. Then mom and Jenelle can drive down, while Sapphire and I fly. Then I will come back for Gracelynn after we get settled.

So, I will need a job and a place to stay for about four-six weeks while I go check the place out (wherever "the place" may be). I want to be sure that we will like it and be able to survive before we just take off across country with the kids. Mom said she will take care of Jenelle, and Grammie will have Gracelynn. My friend, Stephanie, will take care of Sapphire. I will pay all of the bills up ahead of time so the stuff here is taken care of, and then I will take enough money to survive on when I go for my visit. It will be hard to be away from the kids for so long, but it's for them to have a better, happier life (hopefully), and they're young so I really don't think they will remember mom leaving them for a few weeks when I had them for the other 17 years and 11 months.

Since I can't decide on where to move, I am going to flip a coin. "Heads Carolina, Tails California" came to mind when I said that. :) So, heads Carolina.. tails Florida. Next time I write, I'll flip the coin and let everyone know which way it lands!

(Leave a comment!! :P)

Another day..

 Well, I've had a few messages on Cafe Mom about how I forgot about finishing my 'life story'. The reason is because I'm not sure what else to put. I know I only made it up to 2005, but I'm not sure how to explain the next series of events without looking totally irresponsible. And I've talked to some moms about what happened during this year but this story will be a little different, because I don't want every little detail known to the world. So I'm going with the nicer version. :) I'm not one to sugarcoat things, but sometimes it is a necessary evil.

So, May 2005 is when I left Gracelynn's dad. I got my own one bedroom apartment, and Jenelle, Gracelynn, and I moved into it. Gracelynn's grandma (not my mom, but his) has been VERY helpful with Gracelynn since the beginning. When I was pregnant, she helped me with Jenelle. And when Gracelynn was born, she took to her immediately. I mean, she was Grammie's baby from the get-go. We stayed with Grammie for the first two months of her life, before I moved out and got the apartment. There was also a little time in there when Gracelynn was about a month and a half old that I ended up living in a tent.. I haven't really told anyone about that, but I figure it's part of my life story - so why not? I was still trying to hold onto Gracelynn's dad. I loved him, even though I was fed up and had had enough. He was the only one I had loved, so it was hard on me to let him go - even when I knew I had to. My mom said we couldn't live with her, and he had already managed to get kicked out of his mom's house, so I took my paycheck and at his suggestion, bought a tent.

 He had been camping with friends for about a week when we were broken up, so he said it would be 'fun'. Yes, 'fun' is the word he used to describe living in a freakin' tent. And I was stupid enough to go along with it. I had JUST had my gallbladder removed, and two days later I ended up in a tent. Stupid isn't the word for it.  I left Jenelle with my mom at night, on most nights. Gracelynn stayed with Grammie every night. During the day, I would work and carry on a normal life. My boss had no idea that I was living in a tent. When she found out, she said I should "leave the bastard" (yes, those were her words, not mine lol). I respected her and she was a good friend, so I finally just did it. I left. For good.

I lived with my mom for a week or so, and then she kicked me out. I had my apartment already but it didn't have any electric yet (waiting for the next paycheck to be able to turn it on), so I was staying with my mom. Well, my brother and I fought (there is a long story behind him, he is not a normal brother but actually impossible to get along with.. I'll explain some day.. he's a total JERK), so my mom told me and my two kids to get the hell out of her house. So, at about 2 in the morning, I packed our stuff up and we went to our freezing cold apartment and slept. I called Grammie and told her about it all, and she took the two girls for two days. 

Everything got situated at the apartment, and we were doing well. I had a job, the kids were in preschool and daycare (the same place, just different classrooms), and I was staying away from Gracie's dad (he moved to Arkansas right after I left him, but I finally stopped accepting his calls). In December, I called an old boyfriend of mine (Jeremy)... I was calling for a few reasons, but actually the main reason was to see if he had heard from an old friend of ours. His name was Chris, and I hadn't heard from him in a few years. I had always liked him a lot.. he never fit in with our group, he was way too nice. But he was a troublemaker (so was I, at that time). So I tried to ask Jeremy where Chris was or if he had seen him, but he dodged the question and started talking about old times. He wanted to see me. I knew in my heart it was a mistake, but I did it anyway. Life happens, and that's that. Sometimes you can look back on it and say "WHY on earth did I do that?" and you'll never know the answer.

Luckily, I know exactly why things happened that way. We picked up where we had left off, and started fighting again within weeks of seeing each other. He was at my house ALL of the time, and it was just really stressful to deal with having a boyfriend again - I wasn't ready. He was great at the house stuff, though. He cooked, cleaned, took care of the kids, AND worked. I don't know why I pushed him away, but I did. I told him to get lost, and he did. He didn't fight about it with me, he just left. I guess part of me just WANTED him to fight for it, ya know? I'm sure that was wrong, but like I said.. looking back, you can always see things differently. Hindsight is 20/20. 

This was December 2005. The first week of January, I had a doctor's appointment. It was like my yearly check-up. Well, the doctor said that even though I swore I wasn't pregnant, or couldn't be (I was on birth control), that I actually was pregnant. I was in absolute shock. I called Jeremy's house, and his mom wouldn't let me talk to him. She said "Oh shit, you're pregnant aren't you?" I was like "What the heck? NO! Who told you that?" She said "Well, Sadie, I know you - why else would you call Jeremy after you broke up with him? You don't need anything from him." So, I told her I was pregnant. She told Jeremy, and he was really just freaked out. He always wanted a kid, and especially with me (since I already had two), but it just was something I always said no to. We considered getting back together and trying our relationship again, but I said no. We immediately started fighting, about doctor's appointments, which doctor to go to, which hospital to have the baby at, what his/her last name would be, what visitation would be like, etc. I finally just stopped calling him. 

A month later, his sister called me and told me he got another girl pregnant (I later found out that this was not true). I was fed up. I was like okay.. whatever.. I'm done. If he wasn't going to help me with the baby, which he said he wasn't unless he/she had his last name, then I was going to give him/her up for adoption. He ended up getting sent to prison when I was about 6 months pregnant. I decided to give the baby up for adoption. I called a family I knew and started talking to them. I was going to be a surrogate for them a while back, but it didn't work out. But I knew they always wanted another child. So I moved about an hour away from all of my family and friends, to live next door to them. She took me to all of my doctor's appointments, she had stuff ready for the baby (the ultrasound said it was a boy), etc. Everything was set for me to give the baby to them.

If you can do math, at all, you will realize that the baby I'm talking about is Sapphire. At my very last ultrasound, I think I was like 8 months pregnant, they said she was a girl. Obviously, I kept her. BUT...I will finish the story on why and how i kept her, later. :)

Whew..

Well, it's been a TINY bit hectic around here this week. I think I mentioned I'm babysitting for my friend, who has four kids (ages 10 to 15). They are the busiest kids I've ever met! lol Seriously. Between soccer, church, band, wrestling, and school, I'm just lost. I've been a tad frustrated because it seems like they aren't appreciating what I'm doing. It's not that I need to be appreciated, it's that I hope they appreciate their mom when she is here because this is a LOT of work that she does. They are good kids, though, which has helped TREMENDOUSLY.

I just ordered Casting Crowns tickets for myself.. well, me and Jenelle (my oldest, she just turned 6 on Wednesday!). She is going to be BEYOND excited. She wanted to see Hannah Montana, but, well, she's annoying.. and the tickets were outrageously expensive. Casting Crowns is my favorite band/group, so I'm just elated. Normally, I wouldn't have the extra money to get these tickets. But the money Erin paid me for watching her kids this week more than covered it.

I had a LOT to type about yesterday, but I was too busy. Now I'm drawing a blank. My friend, Mary, called me tonight. She said she and the kids need a place to stay for a week or two until they move into their new place. So I am getting ready to go to my house and clean it up a little bit. She will be coming over tomorrow after Jenelle's birthday party.

Tomorrow, I have to bring the oldest to band before 5AM. Then I have to bring the two younger ones to a soccer game by like 8:30 and it's about a 45 minute drive. After the older kid's game ends, we have like an hour and a half and then the youngest one's begins. So we are going to pack a lunch and maybe find a park or something. Then Jenelle's part is at 4PM tomorrow. Sunday, we have church. The kids went with the neighbor tonight, thank goodness. I am going home to clean my house so I couldn't go. She is such an angel, though, seriously. I've never met anyone so nice. She has helped me out SO much this week. I just wish I could pay her or something to show her how much I appreciate it. I feel like I didn't do anything in return, ya know?

Well, Sapphire just started fussing. It's about her bed time. I guess I will bring her home while I clean then wake her up when I'm done and come back here. I really can't see waking up at 4AM to come over here if I sleep at my house all night. I'd rather sleep at their house just to be safe.

I have met quite a few new friends over at Cafe Mom this week. There are some wonderful ladies there and I really wish they all lived closer to me! One thing I did want to mention before I left is that i joined "My Power Mall". I won't try to explain it here, but I did want to say that it is TOTALLY FREE - and that is not a trick, or gimmick, or scam. It doesn't ask for any payment information on your part. All you do is sign up, and if you want to shop then you can get rebates on your shopping. If you don't want to shop, that's okay too. Just visit the site and listen/watch the video.. it will explain it all. It's a way to make some extra cash. I figure it's free to sign up, so if you don't make anything at all.. you still have lost nothing. If you only make $100 that is still +$100, right? So try it. :)
http://www.mypowermall.com/Biz/Home/63788

Life as a soccer mom..

Wow. That's all I can say! When your kids are older, you're pretty much an ATM, hotel, and taxi all in one. This week, I'm babysitting for my friend while she and her husband are on vacation in Belize. They work SO hard (they own their own business), they deserve this break. So usually my day consists of rolling out of bed at like 7:00, maybe 7:30 if I'm lucky. Then I feed Sapphire and Jenelle, and we run out the door.. I bring Sapphire to Head Start and Jenelle and I go to work. On days that I'm off, we just come back home and clean or sleep or whatever. This week, that went OUT the window. :) I woke up at 5:45 this morning, and left the house at 6AM to bring the oldest of the children I'm babysitting to high school. I technically don't have to babysit them.. just look after them.. ya know? So anyway I come back and Sapphire is UP! At 6:20! I was like uhhh NO.. so I turned on the little noisemaker so it sounded like crickets chirping, and she finally went back to sleep. But I had to turn it up pretty loud because she is just the type that if she can hear herself she will stay up. Apparently the little cricket noise maker thingie was up LOUDER than the alarm on my phone. So at 7:55 the boys were like "Hey, Sadie, we gotta go.." We were supposed to leave at 8:00! So I got up, got Sapphire dressed, and we were out the door. We were a little late (not my fault actually the boys took a little longer!), but not bad. I was supposed to pick up the neighbor boy from the high school after I dropped the kids off at the middle school. Well he called his house at like 8:27 saying nobody was there to pick him up yet. I got there at 8:30, so I just missed him. If I knew what he looked like I probably could've found him, but neither of us knew what the other looked like. Sooooooo I came home and called his mom, all frantic like omg I promise I didn't forget your son! And she told me what happened, said it was okay, and asked if I could still pick him up on Thursday. So I said yes, and now here I am finally online. :)

That took energy out of me just thinking about all the things we've done so far (and it's just been one day! Six to go!), and what we WILL be doing. They have soccer practice, girl scouts, soccer games, band, wrestling, and church. On top of that I've got parent meetings, Jenelle's birthday, and Jenelle's birthday party to plan on Saturday. AHHHHH! It's not a bad "AHHHH" lol I promise. It's great. I'm having a blast with all the kids. I'm just not used to 4 kids, plus 2 of mine. It's a nice mix though because they are older. If they were all younger, I'd be running for the hills!

I try to have a useful link in every blog I post, but I'm not on my computer (I'm staying at their house all week) so I really don't have much for ya. I don't know if I've linked this one before, but Starfall (www.starfall.com) is the best website ever for early readers. Jenelle loves to play the games there and they sound the words out for the kids and everything. It's great, so you should check it out. :) Thanks for reading... I will post next time I get a breath! :) Have a blessed week!